October 24, 2011

silly scripture of the week is Exodus 4:24-26

for anyone curious as to missionary work, read the march 2007 new era. i found that it was a pretty accurate representation of what it's like to be on a mission. also, just a friendly reminder, pouch mail is useless. don't use it.

this week, we had 2 more baptisms and a wedding on the same day. the two were the same ones who got married and baptized later that day. Ryan Quillo Mabalon and Rica Mendoza Mabalon. it was a good day because of course, there was food. then the next day, i got to see sis Christine and grace again because they came and visited alijis branch. i then went to a pretty far off place and played with cows and carabaw after a baptismal interview. i then rode home on the 3rd most dangerous spot on a jeepney which is my favorite spot (it's the tailgate). we went on a long road that went by sugar cane fields which was really relaxing and a nice end to a good weekend.

well i have so far spent 300 days on a mission. This is madness! and i've still got a bunch more... oh, well, when in rome...

learned something new this week. actually just realized it, not new information. "lady gaga" in illong and tagolog means "lady stupid".

also actually learned something new, well not new, i knew it before but forgot to write it down. there is a volcano on my island. i saw the fire coming from it the other night when i was on splits in a kinda wilderness area. it was kewl.

also, i saw a huge cock fighting arena, this was about as big as a basketball stadium and looked kinda like one of those spiral circular buildings used to go up to the carpark on the third island in crackdown. i don't know how else to explain it but i know that game very well because i found all 500 agility orbs (which was really really hard) so i know the map very well and it looks a lot like it. i'm serious.

i also saw a drunk Filipino midget...

maybe sometime soon, i'll need to get my wisdom teeth pulled out. but i'm kinda stuck in the Philippines and i don't get much free time or money... dewd ghey

You stay classy Phoenix, i'm Elder Johnson?

October 17, 2011

silly scripture of the week is Proverbs 27:14

2 baptisms this week. their names are Donamy Sta. Maria Caparon and Lyca Nicole Sta. Maria Caparon.

i learned this week that banago (fifth ward area) was the worst part of the city in terms of drugs, prostitution and gangs. it makes sense because it's almost completely squaters areas but they squat literally right next door to the richest part of the city (Santa Clara). it makes sense how i had a hard time with people being rude. this area, no one is really rude or obnoxious but they are not normally receptive either. oh well, can't have everything. the houses are normally rich enough to have AC but they still don't have it here, neither in the chapel. apparently they don't have enough faith to pay a full tithes so they won't receive the blessing of AC.

2 new uses for tires; floor mats and rooster houses.

one thing that's pretty funny to see everywhere is people wearing bags on their heads. they only do it when it is raining, but even still, the bag does nothing but keep your hair dry. i've been told that apparently they believe that people get sick when they get rain on their hair. getting regular water on your hair is ok, also it's only your head. you don't need to worry about your body.

i have learned a valuable lesson this week. sometimes green bananas are ripe and yellow bananas are not ripe. elder phelps took a yellow banana thinking that it was ripe and it wasn't. and i took a green banana (of a different type) and it was. just exactly how this is valuable, i don't know. maybe it will help me in picking out bananas in the future.

speaking of fruits, i've been eating mango float for the past two weeks and in no way is that depressing.

as of right now, i should be good on the socks and shoes front. maybe there can be preparations to send more because they won't arrive here for a few months after you send it.

also, general conference was fun. they had AC and the messages were really good. and yes we are "real missionaries" lol

well i gotta cheese it. ttyl

Oct 10, 2011

Silly scripture of the week is 2 Kings 8:15

Well this week has been rather hard. we've only been able to get four teachings in this area. it's mainly because this area (alijis) is only subdivisions and everyone is always working during the day then busy at night. there aren't as many obnoxious and rude people everywhere though and i haven't had to deal with annoying kids for a while, mainly because there aren't squatters here. the area is a decent place to live, it's kinda like what you would picture in Japanese houses. i got sent to a hard area, but i don't think it was as punishment or anything but rather as a way to improve and to help this area to improve as well. 3 of the past 4 APs came through this area so it can't be bad. my areas so far have only been in the city of bacolod, (3rd ward, 5th ward, Alijis) that may or may not be a good thing. i donno, i think president normally sends the bad missionaries to the most far away and isolated places on the island.

one nice thing here is that there is a mini market just a few minutes walk away from our house. they sell all the stuff we need to eat and survive including donuts. so i've been managing off of that kinda food for a while. i've been eating nothing but junk food for the past few weeks yet i am still skinny. oh well, can't complain.

the chapel that we go to is a two story one, so far, i've been in 3 2-story chapels but this is the first that i am assigned to.

three new uses that i've discovered for tires: table, chair, swing set, lilu dallas multipass.

also, chickens are very important here, elder Phelps summed it up in this statement, "you can kick their dog, their cat, and sometimes even their kids, but don't you ever touch their chickens" i laughed at that because it's true. chickens are a big investment in the Philippines for the fights.

the house that i'm living in is small but it works ok to keep the rain off of us and to keep people from stealing our stuff while we are working. no AC though, oh and worms somehow end up on the bathroom floor all the time. i think they come up from the shower drain.

well i am a busy man, i need to go feed my tamagotchi right now before it eats it's own poop so until next week, i bid you all adieu.

October 2, 2011

silly scripture of the week is John 11:35

well transfers came and i was transferred to Alijis branch. that's a branch, not a ward. it's smaller, so it needs more help to be a ward, mainly more Melchizedek priesthood holders. i'm not sure what i can do to help improve this area but i will try my best. to help the work, i try to think why president would want me in this area (what does he want me to do for this area) and then i think about what i can put in to this area to accomplish his purpose. well, i'll just have to see. it'll be hard to get lessons because everyone is always working during the day and when they get home, they are always busy (cooking, washing, etc..). this last week, we were only able to get in around 7 lessons! granted, i'm still new here so a lot of it had to do with the transfers. oh and my new companion is Elder Phelps. he's a pretty big guy and he's zone leader right now. he'll be going home this December so he's pretty far in his mission but not trunky yet. (maybe just a lil)

even though i had to put up with a lot in fifth ward, i will still miss a lot of people. the hardest part about transfers wasn't coming to a new place or new ward but having to say goodbye to the old ward. Especially to sister Christine and Grace and brother Padul. they have worked a lot with us, Angelo, Ellen and JR as well, it was sad to leave. we had a ward missionary FHE to say goodbye and it was really good night (the day was pretty funny. i'll talk about that later). but i'm not very far away. i'm still in the city, as a matter of fact, i saw sister Christine today at SM but she'll be going to America soon so it was pretty much goodbye. i guess i won't need very much candy for them anymore.

so the funny thing that happened last week was that there was this crazy white lady who doesn't like mormons which was wandering around the church trying to find missionaries. namely white american ones, also namely in my area. she went to the church after everyone had left and was asking a lot of prying questions. she was able to find out where we live and dropped a letter in our mailbox (also there was some noise the night before) it said "aliens, i would like u to come to where i am, belle's pension house. Caroline Ossario" well me and Elder Woodford didn't go because that note sounds like a trap (i wanted to go and find out what it was like in scooby doo). it sounds dangerous i know. we texted the AP's and they gave told us that they knew the name, apparently she went to the office as well. but the next day at district meeting she shows up and is yelling at elder woodford really rudely and he's doing his best to calm her down. i was in the toilet at the time and when i came out i told her that she was trespassing on private property and that if she didn't leave then i would call the police. she didn't like that so i called them, but no answer... go figure. anyways, i come back and let her know that i called the police and that she should leave. i called her "sister" and she yells at me not to call her "sister" because she wasn't my sister and then spits at me. she missed though because i'm like Neo and i can dodge a wrench and a car. i called her "sister" a few times after that just to hit the point across and she tells me to get out of the country and that i'm an alien. apparently she doesn't like Americans in the Philippines, especially Mormons. but the real kicker is that i asked her where she was from (sarcastically) and she said that she was from here. she's white, doesn't know how to speak illongo only English, told elder Woodford that she was from america and she's mad that i'm here.... well, i've been yelled at, spit at and persecuted for my religion, i'm a true Mormon missionary. I really just laughed it off though, it was hilarious! she knows not to try that one again, i won't take that.

oh and i was hugged by a drunk guy the other day. it was actually pretty scary because he was yelling the whole time and halfway across the street he pulled something out of his back pocket. at first i thought it could be a knife but it turns out that it was just a tanduay rhum bottle and he left it so that a car would run it over. he hugged Elder Phelps for a really long time and then later he touched my butt while i was getting into the jeepney. pretty hilarious as well.

i've learned why nobody in the Philippines gets married. the Criteria is ridiculously hard and expensive. at least if you get married first. if you get married after five years of living together and have kids, well then it's a little easier but that just makes people wait to get married, if they get married at all. not to mention, it's almost impossible to get a divorce. thereby making people have kids out of wedlock for fear of getting married and wanting a divorce and being stuck together. this is just another one of those ideas that would be great in theory and in a perfect world would work just fine but it fails miserably in real life application.

also, the weather has been pretty rough, (still hot though) lightning hit really close to our house and knocked the power out for a while. it came back a little later that night but it was LOUD!

 

September 26, 2011

silly scripture of the week is 1 kings 13:24

1 more baptism this week, Charmay Tipon Anecita. this is our 16th baptism and we have become exceedingly efficient at it. (not really, when you start trusting in yourself and not the spirit, that's when you've lost it)

well i am excited for transfers this week. i will miss a few people in the ward, namely all the recent converts and all the ward missionaries that i've made friends with. also the bernales and villanueva families.

i am excited to get away from a few people whom have been rather rude and useless for the ward. namely a certain old lady who got mad at me for turning on the air conditioner, i have no idea what her problem is but she seems to have a few "psychological problems". she lives on top of a sewer (illegally) down the street from us. she is a self entitled "activist" whom "hates foreigners" and she also is less active, probably because she is easily offended by people in the ward. also, i'm excited to work with a different bishop. the bishop has been rather useless. as a matter of fact, i'm really mad at bishop Patrias of bacolod fifth ward right now for a host of many different reasons. but the last straw was when he was informed repeatedly in advance of a baptism going on last saturday for me and Elder Woodford and rather than preside over it (which is his JOB), he chose to play basketball at no other place but in the chapel parking lot. we could see him through the window playing basketball while the baptism was performed and he could see us through the window performing the baptism while he was playing basketball. this in itself is rude and disrespectful. but it is not the first time that no presiding authority from the bishopric has at one of our baptisms and it is by no means the only problem. a few weeks ago, we had been trying to get records updated because that is one of our tasks given to us by president Tobias. the bishop would not let us on the computer. well that would be alright if they would update the records for us but the don't do anything. either because they don't know how or they are too lazy to. they set a bad example by having the young men break the sabbath to buy the bread and the water every sunday. then after church, the bishopric breaks the sabbath again and buys choocks-to-go (chicken) and eats it in the bishop's office with paper over the window to try and be sneaky. well that's not too bad but they use ward funds to pay for it, which is meant to be used by the young men and women. they have also rudely suggesting that we go into priesthood with them because we are "wasting time at the entrance" (if you tell us something like that, don't get mad when we talk to you about breaking the sabbath). we are not members of the ward. priesthood doesn't start on time (no ward meeting has ever started on time) with the Filipino culture, most people are almost always late. so our investigators are always late. if the missionaries aren't there to greet them, how is their first sunday going to be? no one will show them around, they might go into the other ward's sacrament as well. they are hypocrits by offering food and then getting offended when we take the food. well here's a news flash: if you don't want your food to be eaten, don't offer it to someone else. these are just a few of the problems that i've been facing and there are many more. it is something that needs to be addressed but the person to talk to (the stake president) was playing basketball with bishop patrias while we were having our baptism. and yes, i know that this is very public.

i have tolerated these things for a long time (4 transfers or 6 months) but there is a difference between tolerance and tolerating things. i should have tolerance with them, but i cannot tolerate them doing things like this. every ward has their shortcomings and iniquities, i know that i am not perfect myself. i say and do stupid stuff, and i shouldn't expect them to be without faults. but when the bishop decides that basketball is more important than welcoming a new member, that's when he needs to be released. the bishop should have already been released anyways, he lives outside our ward boundaries. hopefully the high council will do something, if not them, then the area office. i won't back down from this. Jesus Christ had tolerance with the sins of the people but he would not save them in their sins he would not tolerate gamblers inside the temple.

also, the other companionship is back at it again, stealing our referrals and going into our area. It was a big deal last time that it happened. but this time, i'll let it pass because i'm probably transferring. no honor among missionaries i guess. i won't stoop down to their level though.

maybe it's the culture shock that's getting to me. i have to deal with no air conditioning, no washer machine, no clean water, no money, and many more things. i'm in a far away country surrounded by people who see things much differently than me. i'm not given much respect and the people that i should rely on are eating choocks to go inside the bishops office. i'm glad that i've had the wonderful ward missionaries to help hold me and elder woodford up. they have been a tremendous help, even in the face of all these problems (and more). if we didn't have them here for us, we would have given up on bringing investigators to the ward. because what good would it do to bring people to a ward and they see things like that.

also, as thanks for them it would be great if someone could send more hot tamales, red vines, twizzlers, big red, and beef jerky. i have enough razors to last me till the end of my mission (thanks mom i really like the razor) but shoes and socks go by quick. i don't need any canned foods at all, i can buy them here. as a matter of fact, things like tuna are much better to buy here. the fish here is much nicer and fresher than back at home. by the way, i'm poo (if you say poor without the "r" that means that your really poor) so if you send me a package, money would be great to include!

one cultural difference is that the Philippines starts celebrating Christmas in September. (one thing that they're early for) it doesn't even get cold here though. it's always hot! and apparently, they celebrate everything with festivals, parades and fireworks. They even make a big deal out of a baby's first birthday.

everyone here always calls me and Elder Woodford "mga gwapo" which pretty much means "handsome people". We know that it's just because we're white. back at home we're alright looking. but here we can be like "Mmmmm... I look good. I mean really good. Hey everyone... come and see how good I look." but I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking. And I plan on finding out what that is.

well i'm about at my 9 month mark, so that's good. 15 more to go.... time flies and goes by really slowly... i'll let you know where i transfer too next week! hopefully i won't have to deal with these problems anymore. 

September 19, 2011

silly scripture of the week is Genesis 34:24-25.
*Correction for Silly Scripture of the week for June 20* Ezra 9:3
*Correction for Silly scripture of the week for August 15* Genesis 19:26

well we had one more baptism this week. her name is Jeany Bernales Glaraga.

it's interesting to note that pictures from back home have people wearing sweaters. when i got here in march, it was hot. and it's been hot since then. today it's still hot. well it sucks to be on the equator at sea level. because there are only two seasons; hot season and hot and rainy season.

this week, i've kinda experienced culture shock. mainly with things that annoy me, like how almost every meeting starts late and how everyone is so easily offended and about how everyone gossips and how little kids always touch my white shirt with their hands after playing in the mud or how they're always asking for money or how they're yelling obscenities all these things compile on themselves and make for a really stressful time. the main way to deal with it is just laugh it off.

even though there are a few things that i get upset with here, there are a lot of things that make the work worth it and easier to deal with, especially having a good strong ward missionary group. i have a lot of respect for the ward missionaries because they put in so much work all the time that it makes me ashamed that i only worked with missionaries for a few hours every week. i especially have respect for Brother Padul (our ward mission leader) who is the most dedicated of them all, not only him but Brother Ponteras has my respect for all of his support. As does Sister Christine whom has probably been the single biggest help for missionaries in fifth ward, Enrique (who is now a missionary) helped to go on splits all the time, and the whole Suarez family whom has been great to us as well.
pretty soon, i'll probably be transferring from fifth ward, so i just wanna remember the people who made my stay here great.

September 12, 2011

silly scripture of the week is Job 41

so this week was pretty unexciting. a lot of the things that i have been doing seem more or less like working in a business or in some government organization. for instance, elder woodford and i have been acting as teaching aides for an English class run by one of our members. this has helped us to find investigators (it's one of the finding ideas inside of preach my gospel) but it has also given us the opportunity to do a community service project where we graded a bunch of English teachers on their pronunciation of the language. it was an interview style of examination and many of the teachers were REALLY nervous, probably because they thought that their job was on the line. we were just grading them though and then the administrator would make his decisions from those grades. it was so weird to be on the other side of the interview table, seeing people come in shaking and scared really made me feel like i was more of a business man for a while.

it's funny how we can be completely professional in a nice air conditioned building in a nice comfortable chair and then go out and walk in mud and on bamboo bridges. immediately after finishing with all that business stuff we went to banago to a member's house. there, they have a lot of ducks and a mama duck. the kids are scared of the mama duck because it attacks them (to protect it's kids). but the duck knows not to mess with us. we picked her up and scared the kids with the duck. ducks don't bite hard, they kinda tickle. i'm sure that duck will be eaten sometime soon because the kids were trying to fight back. it's taken me a while and it's sad, but i've kinda become ok with seeing animals die here. i've seen so many things die that i kinda just don't care anymore. and besides, it's what we eat.

i've also had a business type difficulty. one of the new tasks that we have been appointed (all missionaries in negros) is to update the ward records. so we've been going to a lot of houses and finding names and people who have moved and then going back to the church to update the records. we did that for a while until the stake or bishopric disallowed us from going on the computer. i understand the reasoning, they need to have the computers secured and access limited, to avoid viruses and unauthorized access. but who is more trustworthy than the people who wear the church's name tag on their chest everyday?

not only that, but the ward hasn't updated their records for years, which gave me and elder woodford a lot of work to do. our recent baptisms have been put in by the mission office, but the ward baptisms still haven't been updated from months ago and maybe never will. not only that, but when asking for records from the ward clerk, he didn't even know how to use the program properly to find what i needed. i had to get on the computer myself to show him how to do it. we had ward council about it and have worked out a "solution" but it would be much easier and efficient if missionaries were allowed access to the records and the chapel. in order for us to help them, they need to help us.

last week, it rained pretty hard and it was flooded so i walked though a bunch of dirty water. i really wish i had some water proof shoes. mold is growing on my shoes... literally. this isn't a movie quote or anything, i literally have mold growing in my shoes and it's not like i can just go to the store and buy a new size 13-14 shoe. i'm on an island here where 99% of native people have shoe sizes smaller than 11.

my mind has been going back towards home for the past few days. i have great confidence in america's security systems but attacks could come from anywhere. and today (for America September 11, 2011) marks the ten year anniversary of the day that thousands of innocent American citizens died in an unprovoked attack by a bunch of psychopaths who hijacked four planes and flew two of them into the world trade center. i only hope that today is a peaceful day in America, and that no one will be harmed by any acts of terrorism on American soil, and that there will be no repeated attacks on America by cowards too afraid to show their faces.